LEADERSHIP

Are You in a Rut? 3 Ways to Start Believing and Trusting Yourself Again

My mentor, Dr. Saul Miller, once shared a story with me which included an insight about the legendary Michael Jordan. It was not a picturesque scene on the basketball court one evening when Jordan found himself in a slump, shooting but not sinking his shots. One of his teammates, puzzled by his persistence, questioned his relentless pursuit of the basket. Jordan's response was stark and to the point: "I make my shots." This moment speaks volumes about the power of belief and self-trust - two qualities which are important not only in sport, but in life.

What is Belief?

Belief typically follows a sequential progression. It starts with a thought, then moves to a feeling, and finally evolves into knowing. Jordan knew something that evening. He makes his shots. Even though he was missing his shots in that specific moment in time, his belief in his abilities never wavered. As humans, we engage in cognitive processes every single day where we think about a concept, idea, or information. These thoughts then spark emotional responses, which leads to the second stage where belief is intertwined with feelings and emotional reactions. Over time, as we continue to ponder and emotionally connect with a belief, it solidifies into a knowing—a sense of certainty and conviction about that particular belief. Assuming it is a healthy belief, this is where the magic happens. So, how does one foster a sense of belief in themselves? There are three specific approaches you can deploy right now to acheive it.

How to Start Believing and Trusting Yourself

1. Let Your Past Empower You

As a hockey player, you have experienced your fair share of moments of triumph and adversity. Both have instilled lessons which can be gleaned to enhance your level of belief. Again, belief starts as a thought or reflection, moves to a feeling, and then develops into knowing. The goal in this case is to be intentional on focusing on your past performances but with a more concentrated attention on your successes rather than failures. The goal is to use your past successes as beacons of inspiration and draw strength from them. Whether it was a game-winning goal or a stellar defensive play, compile these instances into a mental highlight reel to serve as a testament to your capabilities. Harness the power of retrospection to fuel your confidence, knowing the triumphs of yesterday pave the path to success tomorrow.

Exercise: Document the Evidence

After each game, take a moment to reflect. Identify two areas where you excelled and one aspect warranting improvement. By acknowledging your strengths and areas for growth, you cultivate a mindset primed for continuous improvement and self-belief.

2. Kill Your Limiting Beliefs

Beliefs are powerful. However, a belief can become limiting if you let it. When a belief is first embraced and genuinely accepted, it can inspire and motivate individuals to achieve their goals and dreams. But, if this belief remains unexamined and unchallenged, it may gradually become limiting. I will give you a few examples. Have you ever found yourself thinking:

  • "I am too slow to backcheck."
  • "I am not fast enough to play as a winger."
  • "I am not strong enough."
  • "I am not as sharp as I need to be to read plays on defense."

As hockey players repeatedly encounter situations that confirm beliefs like the above, they may unintentionally reinforce their limitations, constraining their perspectives and actions. With that being said, it is vital to prevent beliefs from becoming limiting. In order to acheive this goal, it is essential to engage in ongoing self-reflection. This process encourages beliefs to remain empowering and adaptable rather than restrictive.

Exercise: Identify Your Limiting Beliefs

Take a moment and identify a few of your limiting beliefs or negative thoughts. Once you have them listed, the next task is to challenge them. Are they really true? The answer is "No." Prove they are wrong by creating a new set of 3-5 beliefs which capture the real you like: "I am the hardest worker on my team" or "I am calm and composed under pressure." Keep them positive and in the present tense.

3. "Be" Your Ideal Self Right Now

Dr. John Demartini created a transformative philosophy centered around the concept of "Be, Do, Have." It is a philosophy that holds immense relevance for hockey players. I will break it down in greater detail. "Be" involves imagining oneself in the future as the ideal hockey player, embracing the mindset of a confident, skilled, and accomplished athlete. Not tomorrow, next week, or even next month. Right now. Be that person. This mental image sets the stage for the subsequent stages. With the proper mindset in place, hockey players can transition to "Do," where they actively engage in actions and behaviors aligned with their envisioned future selves. They execute plays, make decisions, and hone their skills with unwavering dedication. Over time, this consistent action culminates in the realization of "Have." Players begin to manifest the outcomes they desire, experiencing success on the ice.

Dr. Demartini's "Be, Do, Have" approach underscores that it is not enough to simply visualize the end result. Rather, it is about embodying the right mindset in this present moment, being willing to put in the work and achieving your desired outcomes. In other words, focus on your mindset first and "Be" who you want to be right now. The results will follow.

Exercise: Who Do You Want to Be?

Who you want to "Be" is the most powerful part of "Be. Do. Have." Carve out a few minutes and answer the following:

What is your main goal as a hockey player?

How will you feel if you accomplished this goal?

What actions can you take today to move you closer to achieving that goal?

Parting Advice

Belief serves as the bedrock upon which great hockey players are forged. Remember, like the Jordan example, it is not merely about making shots - it is about believing you will. Trust your past successes, kill those limiting beliefs, and prioritize your mindset, and you will begin to experience a heightened sense of belief and confidence.






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